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In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

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The life of the salaf between speech and action.

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The concern of the salaf for their children.

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Their encouragement of them and their refusal to belittle them.

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One day, Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, said to the Companions of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him:

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"What do you think this verse was revealed about?"

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“Would any of you like to have a garden of palm-trees and vines, with rivers flowing underneath it, with all kinds of fruit for him therein; and old age hath stricken him and he hath feeble offspring; and a fiery whirlwind striketh it and it is (all) consumed by fire. Thus Allah maketh plain His revelations unto you, in order that ye may give thought.” (2:266)

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They replied, "Allah knows best."

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Umar became angry.

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He said, "Say 'we know' or 'we do not know'."

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Ibn Abbas, may Allah be pleased with him, said:

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"I have something in my mind regarding it, O Commander of the Faithful."

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Umar said, "O my brother, speak and do not belittle yourself."

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Ibn Abbas said, "I have struck a parable for an action."

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Umar asked, "What action?"

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Ibn Abbas replied, "For an action."

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Umar asked, "For a wealthy man?"

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"Who acts in obedience to Allah, the Almighty and Majestic," Ibn Abbas said.

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"Then Allah sends the devil to him."

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"So he commits sins until he drowns his deeds."

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Regarding Ibn Abbas, may Allah be pleased with him, he said:

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"Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, used to include me with the elders of Badr."

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Some of them said:

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"Why do you bring this youth in with us when we have sons like him?"

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He replied, "He is of those whom you know."

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He said, "So he called them one day and called me with them."

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He said, "I do not think he called me that day,"

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"except to show them what I knew."

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He asked, "What do you say about [the verse]..."

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“When Allah's succour and the triumph cometh” (110:1)

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“And thou seest mankind entering the religion of Allah in troops,” (110:2)

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...until he finished the surah.

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Some of them said:

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"We are commanded to praise Allah and seek His forgiveness when He grants us victory and opens [the lands] for us."

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Others said:

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"We do not know," or some of them said nothing.

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Then he said to me:

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"O Ibn Abbas, is that your view?"

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I said, "No."

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He asked, "Then what do you say?"

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I said, "It is the term of the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him."

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"Allah informed him of it."

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"When the victory of Allah and the conquest—the conquest of Makkah—comes,"

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"that is the sign of your term."

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“Then hymn the praises of thy Lord, and seek forgiveness of Him. Lo! He is ever ready to show mercy.” (110:3)

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"Indeed, He is ever Accepting of repentance."

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Umar said:

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"I know nothing of it other than what you know."

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Yusuf Ibn al-Majishun said:

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Ibn Shihab, may Allah have mercy on him, said to us:

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"I, my nephew, and my cousin,"

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"while we were young boys,"

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"would ask him about hadith."

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"Do not belittle yourselves because of your youth."

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"For Umar Ibn al-Khattab, may Allah be pleased with him,"

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"whenever a difficult matter befell him,"

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"would call the young men and consult them."

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Justice between them.

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Ibrahim, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

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"They used to like to treat their children equally,"

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"even in kissing them."

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And from Umar Ibn Abd al-Aziz, may Allah have mercy on him:

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That he embraced a son of his whom he loved.

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He said, "O so-and-so,"

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"By Allah, I truly love you,"

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"but I cannot favor you over your brother with even a morsel."

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Al-Hasan, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

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"If a teacher does not treat the children equally,"

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"he is recorded among the oppressors."

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Marrying off sons and daughters.

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Asma Bint Abi Bakr, may Allah be pleased with her, said:

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"Marriage is a form of bondage,"

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"so let one of you look at where he places his freedwoman."

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Sa'id Ibn al-'As, may Allah be pleased with him, said:

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"If I teach my child the Qur'an,"

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"have him perform Hajj, and marry him off,"

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"then I have fulfilled his right,"

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"and my right upon him remains."

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A man said to al-Hasan, may Allah have mercy on him:

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"I have a young daughter, and she is being sought for marriage."

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"To whom should I marry her?"

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He replied, "Marry her to one who fears Allah."

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"For if he loves her, he will honor her,"

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"and if he dislikes her, he will not oppress her."

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Showing them affection and love.

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And playing with them.

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Al-Bara' Ibn 'Azib, may Allah be pleased with him, said:

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"I entered with Abu Bakr, may Allah be pleased with him,"

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"when he first arrived in Madinah."

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"And there was 'A'ishah, his daughter, may Allah be pleased with her,"

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"lying down, having been struck by a fever."

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Abu Bakr came to her and said to her:

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"How are you, my daughter?"

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And he kissed her cheek.

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'Uqbah Ibn al-Harith said:

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"I went out with Abu Bakr, may Allah be pleased with him,"

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"after the 'Asr prayer,"

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"a few nights after the death of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,"

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"and 'Ali, may Allah be pleased with him,"

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"was walking beside him."

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He was playing with some boys.

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He carried him on his neck while saying:

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"By my father, he resembles the Prophet,"

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"he does not resemble 'Ali."

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He said, "And 'Ali was laughing."

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Ibn Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, used to:

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When he met his son Salim, kiss him and say:

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"An old man kissing an old man."

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And from Abu Wa'ilah:

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He felt a sense of resentment toward his son Yazid.

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He stayed awake all night because of it.

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When morning came,

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he sent for al-Ahnaf Ibn Qays, may Allah have mercy on him.

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He came to him, and when he entered,

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he said to him, "O Abu Bahr,"

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"how is your satisfaction with your child?"

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"And what do you say about children?"

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He said, "I said to myself,"

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"The Commander of the Faithful is not asking about this,"

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"except for a resentment he feels toward Yazid."

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"So words came to me,"

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"that if I had spent a year polishing them,"

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"I would have done well."

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"I said, 'O Commander of the Faithful,'"

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"'they are the fruits of our hearts,'"

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"'and the pillars of our backs.'"

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"'We are for them a humble earth.'"

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"'O Commander of the Faithful, be humble toward them,'"

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"'and if they ask of you, give to them.'"

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"'They will give you their pure love,'"

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"'and show you their utmost kindness.'"

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"'Do not be a burden upon them,'"

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"'giving them only a pittance,'"

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"'lest they grow weary of your life and hate your presence.'"

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He said, "May Allah reward you, O Ahnaf."

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"By Allah, I only sent for you,"

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"because you have extracted the malice from my heart."

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Some of the salaf, may Allah have mercy on them, said:

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"Be dutiful to your child,"

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"for it is more likely that he will be dutiful to you."

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"And whoever wishes, let him be undutiful to his child."

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Greeting children with peace.

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From 'Uthman, from Ibrahim, he said:

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"I saw Ibn Umar, may Allah be pleased with him,"

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"passing by us while we were children."

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And Thabit al-Bunani,

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may Allah have mercy on him, passed by some children,

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and he greeted them with peace.

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Thabit narrated that he used to

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walk with Anas, may Allah be pleased with him,

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and he passed by some children and greeted them.

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And Anas narrated that he used to

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walk with the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,

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and he passed by some children and greeted them.

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Playing with children and the allowance for their games.

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From al-Hasan, may Allah have mercy on him:

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That he entered his house,

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and children were playing on top of the house.

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A man with him forbade them,

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but al-Hasan said, "Leave them,"

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"for play is their springtime."

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And Ibrahim al-Nakha'i, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

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"They used to permit children all kinds of play,"

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"except with dogs."

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Caring for orphans and disciplining them.

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From Abu al-Darda', may Allah be pleased with him, who said:

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"Fear the tear of the orphan,"

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"and the supplication of the oppressed,"

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"for they travel by night while people are asleep."

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It was said to Ibn Sirin, may Allah have mercy on him:

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"I have an orphan."

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He said, "Do for him what you do for your own child."

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"Discipline him as you discipline your own child."

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And from Farqad al-Sabakhi, may Allah have mercy on him, who said:

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"There is no table created,"

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"of greater honor than a table,"

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"at which an orphan is fed."

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Other benefits: Ibn Abbas,

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may Allah be pleased with them both, said regarding the saying of Allah the Almighty:

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﴾And those who believed﴿

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﴾and whose descendants followed them in faith﴿

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He said:

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"The believer’s descendants will be raised to his level,"

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"even if they are lower than him in deeds,"

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"so that Allah, the Almighty and Majestic, may gladden his eyes with them."

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He also said, may Allah be pleased with him,

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regarding the saying of Allah the Almighty:

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﴾And those who say, "Our Lord, grant us..."﴿

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“And who say: Our Lord! Vouchsafe us comfort of our wives and of our offspring, and make us patterns for (all) those who ward off (evil).” (25:74)

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"...the coolness of eyes. It does not mean,"

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"the coolness of eyes is to see them healthy,"

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"or beautiful, but rather to see them,"

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"obedient to Allah, the Almighty and Majestic."

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Al-Hasan al-Basri, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

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Regarding the saying of Allah the Almighty, "Grant us..."

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“And who say: Our Lord! Vouchsafe us comfort of our wives and of our offspring, and make us patterns for (all) those who ward off (evil).” (25:74)

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"...coolness of eyes in the obedience of Allah."

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"And there is nothing more cooling to the eye of the believer,"

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"than to see his loved one in obedience."

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Malik Ibn Dinar, may Allah have mercy on him, saw:

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A man performing his prayer poorly.

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He said, "How merciful I am toward his family."

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It was said to him, "This man performs his prayer poorly,"

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"and you show mercy to his family?"

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He said that he is their elder.

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And from him they learn.

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Ayyub al-Sakhtiyani, may Allah have mercy on him, used to—

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when congratulating someone on a newborn—say:

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May Allah make him a blessing for you,

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and for the Ummah of Muhammad, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him.