1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:11,300 Our Mother ‘Aishah, may Allah be pleased with her. 2 00:00:11,300 --> 00:00:16,690 “O ‘Aishah, love him, for I love him.” 3 00:00:16,690 --> 00:00:24,660 Agreement between spouses on family-related matters 4 00:00:24,660 --> 00:00:28,660 helps them navigate life without conflict. 5 00:00:28,660 --> 00:00:34,750 Among these matters is the relationship with individuals connected to the family. 6 00:00:34,750 --> 00:00:39,750 This relationship may lead to their frequent presence in the home. 7 00:00:39,750 --> 00:00:42,750 It may also lead to a strong emotional attachment, 8 00:00:42,750 --> 00:00:47,750 stemming from the love and affection held by one of the family members, 9 00:00:47,750 --> 00:00:49,750 which then becomes apparent in their behavior. 10 00:00:49,750 --> 00:00:54,979 If there is no consensus between the spouses regarding such a person, 11 00:00:54,979 --> 00:00:57,979 jealousy often arises between them. 12 00:00:57,979 --> 00:01:03,979 Problems then occur, or are fabricated without the true cause being stated. 13 00:01:03,979 --> 00:01:10,329 The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, was keen in his upbringing of his household 14 00:01:10,329 --> 00:01:14,329 to address this problem before it occurred. 15 00:01:14,329 --> 00:01:21,329 He guided women in particular toward etiquettes that prevent such problems from arising. 16 00:01:21,329 --> 00:01:25,359 And because we are speaking about the truthful one, daughter of the truthful one, 17 00:01:25,359 --> 00:01:30,359 whom the Prophet, peace be upon him, raised under his own care, 18 00:01:30,359 --> 00:01:33,359 we will mention the situations she experienced, 19 00:01:33,359 --> 00:01:38,359 which contain the Prophet’s instruction to her or to others, 20 00:01:38,359 --> 00:01:41,359 relevant to our topic in this article. 21 00:01:41,359 --> 00:01:47,519 The first situation concerns the love of the Prophet, peace be upon him, 22 00:01:47,519 --> 00:01:51,519 for Usamah ibn Zayd, may Allah be pleased with them both. 23 00:01:51,519 --> 00:01:56,519 The Prophet, peace be upon him, declared in more than one situation 24 00:01:56,519 --> 00:02:00,519 his love for Usamah and announced it to the people. 25 00:02:00,519 --> 00:02:04,519 For it is narrated from ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Umar, may Allah be pleased with them both, 26 00:02:04,519 --> 00:02:09,520 that the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, sent an expedition 27 00:02:09,520 --> 00:02:12,520 and appointed Usamah ibn Zayd as its commander. 28 00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:15,520 The people criticized his command, 29 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:19,520 so the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, stood up and said: 30 00:02:19,520 --> 00:02:22,520 “If you criticize his command, 31 00:02:22,520 --> 00:02:26,520 you criticized the command of his father before him. 32 00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:30,520 By Allah, he was indeed worthy of command, 33 00:02:30,520 --> 00:02:34,520 and he was among the most beloved of people to me, 34 00:02:34,520 --> 00:02:38,520 and this one is among the most beloved of people to me after him.” 35 00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:40,780 Narrated by Al-Bukhari. 36 00:02:40,780 --> 00:02:44,780 Thus, the Prophet, peace be upon him, announced to everyone 37 00:02:44,780 --> 00:02:47,780 that he loved Usamah ibn Zayd, 38 00:02:47,780 --> 00:02:52,780 even though Usamah was from outside the Prophet’s immediate family. 39 00:02:52,780 --> 00:02:57,780 So how did the Prophet, peace be upon him, raise his family to love him? 40 00:02:57,780 --> 00:02:59,780 We mentioned before 41 00:02:59,780 --> 00:03:04,780 that the Prophet, peace be upon him, utilized life situations 42 00:03:04,780 --> 00:03:08,780 to educate his household and the Companions around him, 43 00:03:08,780 --> 00:03:12,780 may Allah be pleased with them all. 44 00:03:12,780 --> 00:03:15,000 Among these situations 45 00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:18,000 is what was narrated by ‘Aishah, may Allah be pleased with her, 46 00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:20,000 where she said: 47 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:25,060 The Prophet, peace be upon him, wanted to remove some dirt from Usamah. 48 00:03:25,060 --> 00:03:27,060 ‘Aishah said: 49 00:03:27,060 --> 00:03:31,060 “Leave him to me, so that I may be the one to do it.” 50 00:03:31,060 --> 00:03:32,060 He said: 51 00:03:32,060 --> 00:03:35,060 “O ‘Aishah, love him, 52 00:03:35,060 --> 00:03:37,060 for I love him.” 53 00:03:37,060 --> 00:03:39,419 Narrated by Al-Tirmidhi. 54 00:03:39,419 --> 00:03:45,419 Indeed, agreement between spouses on loving a young child from outside the family 55 00:03:45,419 --> 00:03:49,419 prevents harm from befalling the child from any party. 56 00:03:49,419 --> 00:03:53,419 Especially if this child is from another wife of the husband, 57 00:03:53,419 --> 00:03:59,419 for the wise woman loves her husband’s children to gain his love, 58 00:03:59,419 --> 00:04:02,419 as he loves those who love them. 59 00:04:02,419 --> 00:04:04,479 The matter may also be the reverse, 60 00:04:04,479 --> 00:04:07,479 where the upbringing of the children 61 00:04:07,479 --> 00:04:10,479 is to align with their father in who he loves. 62 00:04:10,479 --> 00:04:12,479 This is the second situation, 63 00:04:12,479 --> 00:04:17,480 which ‘Aishah, may Allah be pleased with her, narrates, saying: 64 00:04:17,480 --> 00:04:21,480 The wives of the Prophet, peace be upon him, sent 65 00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:25,480 Fatimah, daughter of the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, 66 00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:29,480 to the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him. 67 00:04:29,480 --> 00:04:34,509 She asked permission to enter while he was lying with me under my garment, 68 00:04:34,509 --> 00:04:36,509 so he gave her permission. 69 00:04:36,509 --> 00:04:38,509 She said: “O Messenger of Allah, 70 00:04:38,509 --> 00:04:41,509 your wives have sent me to you 71 00:04:41,509 --> 00:04:44,509 asking you for justice regarding the daughter of Abu Quhafah.” 72 00:04:44,509 --> 00:04:46,509 I remained silent. 73 00:04:46,509 --> 00:04:48,509 She said: 74 00:04:48,509 --> 00:04:52,509 The Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, said to her: 75 00:04:52,509 --> 00:04:54,509 “O my daughter, 76 00:04:54,509 --> 00:04:56,509 do you not love what I love?” 77 00:04:56,509 --> 00:04:58,509 She said: “Yes.” 78 00:04:58,509 --> 00:04:59,509 He said: 79 00:04:59,509 --> 00:05:01,540 “Then love this one.” 80 00:05:01,540 --> 00:05:03,540 She said: 81 00:05:03,540 --> 00:05:09,699 Fatimah stood up when she heard that from the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, 82 00:05:09,699 --> 00:05:13,699 and returned to the wives of the Prophet, peace be upon him, 83 00:05:13,699 --> 00:05:16,699 and informed them of what she had said 84 00:05:16,699 --> 00:05:20,699 and what the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, had said to her. 85 00:05:20,699 --> 00:05:22,699 They said to her: 86 00:05:22,699 --> 00:05:25,699 “We do not see that you have helped us at all. 87 00:05:25,699 --> 00:05:29,699 Return to the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, 88 00:05:29,699 --> 00:05:31,699 and say to him: 89 00:05:31,699 --> 00:05:35,699 ‘Your wives ask you for justice regarding the daughter of Abu Quhafah.’” 90 00:05:35,699 --> 00:05:37,699 Fatimah said: 91 00:05:37,699 --> 00:05:41,699 “By Allah, I will never speak to him about her again.” 92 00:05:41,699 --> 00:05:43,959 Narrated by Muslim. 93 00:05:43,959 --> 00:05:48,959 The statement of the Prophet, peace be upon him, to his daughter Fatimah, 94 00:05:48,959 --> 00:05:49,959 “O my daughter, 95 00:05:49,959 --> 00:05:52,959 do you not love what I love?” 96 00:05:52,959 --> 00:05:57,959 is worthy of being said to every daughter of the Muslims. 97 00:05:57,959 --> 00:06:02,959 If the daughter wishes to be dutiful to her father, 98 00:06:02,959 --> 00:06:08,089 then applying this word of the Prophet, peace be upon him, practically 99 00:06:08,089 --> 00:06:14,089 is sufficient to keep the daughter’s heart free from malice, hatred, and resentment, 100 00:06:14,089 --> 00:06:18,089 and preserves her tongue from backbiting and slander. 101 00:06:18,089 --> 00:06:23,089 It is also sufficient to prevent problems between children and stepmothers. 102 00:06:23,089 --> 00:06:29,220 Among the etiquettes the Prophet, peace be upon him, guided the wife toward 103 00:06:29,220 --> 00:06:33,220 to avoid falling into such problems 104 00:06:33,220 --> 00:06:37,220 based on differing stances toward people, 105 00:06:37,220 --> 00:06:42,220 is that the wife should not permit anyone to enter the marital home 106 00:06:42,220 --> 00:06:45,279 except those whom the husband approves of. 107 00:06:45,279 --> 00:06:48,279 The Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, said: 108 00:06:48,279 --> 00:06:53,279 “It is not lawful for a woman to fast while her husband is present except with his permission, 109 00:06:53,279 --> 00:06:57,279 and she should not give permission for anyone to enter his house except with his permission.” 110 00:06:57,279 --> 00:06:59,470 Narrated by Al-Bukhari. 111 00:06:59,470 --> 00:07:02,470 And he, peace be upon him, said: 112 00:07:02,470 --> 00:07:05,470 “Know that you have a right over your wives, 113 00:07:05,470 --> 00:07:08,470 and your wives have a right over you. 114 00:07:08,470 --> 00:07:11,470 As for your right over your wives, 115 00:07:11,470 --> 00:07:14,470 they should not allow those you dislike to tread upon your bedding, 116 00:07:14,470 --> 00:07:18,470 nor should they give permission in your houses to those you dislike.” 117 00:07:18,470 --> 00:07:20,470 Narrated by Al-Tirmidhi. 118 00:07:20,470 --> 00:07:26,759 This hadith indicates the difference in stance toward people between spouses. 119 00:07:26,759 --> 00:07:31,759 And so that this difference does not affect the relationship between the spouses, 120 00:07:31,759 --> 00:07:35,759 the woman was commanded to keep people she loves— 121 00:07:35,759 --> 00:07:39,759 but whom the husband does not love—away from the marital home. 122 00:07:39,759 --> 00:07:41,759 They should not enter the house, 123 00:07:41,759 --> 00:07:44,759 nor should they come near the family, 124 00:07:44,759 --> 00:07:47,759 to protect this family from problems. 125 00:07:47,759 --> 00:07:51,889 If this etiquette is for the protection of the family, 126 00:07:51,889 --> 00:07:55,889 then a woman should not allow anyone the husband dislikes to enter her home. 127 00:07:55,889 --> 00:08:00,889 So how can we invite into our hearts those whom Allah, the Almighty, dislikes, 128 00:08:00,889 --> 00:08:04,889 or those who are hostile to the Prophet, peace be upon him, 129 00:08:04,889 --> 00:08:06,889 and mock his Sunnah, 130 00:08:06,889 --> 00:08:11,889 or attack the honor of his wives, the Mothers of the Believers? 131 00:08:11,889 --> 00:08:17,920 Do we not love those whom the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, loves? 132 00:08:17,920 --> 00:08:21,180 Let us then love ‘Aishah, may Allah be pleased with her, 133 00:08:21,180 --> 00:08:24,180 name our daughters after her, 134 00:08:24,180 --> 00:08:26,180 defend her, 135 00:08:26,180 --> 00:08:29,180 and spread her biography among the people. 136 00:08:29,180 --> 00:08:36,179 May she be a role model for every woman who loves Allah and His Messenger, peace be upon him. 137 00:08:36,179 --> 00:08:40,620 We will continue in a future meeting, if Allah wills. 138 00:08:40,620 --> 00:08:43,620 And praise be to Allah, Lord of the Worlds. 139 00:08:43,620 --> 00:08:50,570 Our Mother ‘Aishah, may Allah be pleased with her.