In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
The types of men in the hadith of Umm Zar‘.
The hadith of Umm Zar‘.
Did the woman cause the divorce of Umm Zar‘?
When a man marries a second wife.
We hear from people or from the first wife.
That the second wife ruined the first wife’s life.
Or that she destroyed the first wife’s home.
In fact, this phrase has become—
"I do not want to destroy the first wife's home"—
Common on the tongues of many women.
Whom a married man proposes to marry.
So, what is the validity of this statement?
First, polygyny cannot be—
A cause for the ruin of homes.
And no one would say such a thing—
Except one who does not truly believe in Allah.
And has not known their Lord as He ought to be known.
For the legislation of polygyny—
Is issued by Allah, the Almighty and Exalted.
And He is the All-Knowing, the All-Wise.
Any objection or criticism regarding the subject of polygyny—
Is an objection against Allah.
And a challenge to His law, which is built upon His knowledge and wisdom.
Second.
Allah has stipulated justice between wives—
For anyone who wishes to marry more than one wife.
And adding any condition that Allah, the Almighty and Exalted, did not stipulate—
Is an accusation of deficiency against the law of Allah.
And this is an explicit challenge to the Sharia of Allah and His judgment.
Third.
The incorrect application by some men—
Of the subject of polygyny.
And their failure to maintain justice—
Does not permit us to challenge the law of Allah.
For the shortcomings of men in maintaining justice—
Are like the shortcomings of many Muslims in adhering to the law of Allah in other matters.
A man’s marriage to a second woman—
Is not the cause of the corruption of his home, if it becomes corrupt.
So, what is the real reason for the corruption of homes in cases of polygyny?
And who is responsible for that?
Is it the man or the woman?
And what is the relationship of these questions to the story of Umm Zar‘?
Perhaps we can answer these questions—
By reflecting on the story of Umm Zar‘.
Regarding this woman whom Abu Zar‘ married.
First.
How did Abu Zar‘ know—
The size and shape of the woman’s breasts?
Umm Zar‘ described the shape of the woman’s breasts.
And likened them to two pomegranates.
And certainly, the woman was not naked—
For Abu Zar‘ to see that from her.
So how did Abu Zar‘ know the size of her chest?
She must have been wearing clothing—
That outlined her body.
Otherwise, he would not have known the size of her breasts.
And this is something that Islam has forbidden for women.
Because outlining a woman’s body tempts men.
And hadiths have been narrated that indicate—
The prohibition of clothing that outlines the body.
Among which is—
On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said:
The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:
"There are two types of the people of Hell whom I have not seen:
A people with whips like the tails of cattle,
With which they strike the people,
And women who are clothed yet naked,
Seducing and seduced,
Their heads like the swaying humps of camels.
They will not enter Paradise,
Nor will they smell its fragrance,
Even though its fragrance can be smelled from such-and-such a distance."
Narrated by Muslim.
Ibn ‘Abd al-Barr (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
"It means they are clothed in name,
But naked in reality,
Since those clothes do not cover them."
And al-Tayyibi (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
"He affirmed clothing for them, then negated it,
Because the reality of clothing is to cover the ‘awrah (private parts).
So if covering is not achieved,
It is as if they are not clothed."
And Ibn Battal (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
"He means clothed in garments that describe—
Their bodies to those other than their husbands,
And those for whom it is forbidden to look at that from them,
While they are naked in reality."
So, clothing that describes a woman’s body and her charms—
Makes her appear as if she is naked,
So the man knows all the details of her body—
From her clothes.
And among the explicit hadiths forbidding a woman—
From wearing what describes her body—
Is the hadith of Usamah ibn Zayd.
He said: "The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) clothed me—
With a thick Qubti garment,
When Dihyah al-Kalbi gifted it to him.
So I gave it to my wife.
Then the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said to me:
'Why did you not wear the Qubti garment?'
I said: 'O Messenger of Allah,
I gave it to my wife.'
Then the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said to me:
'Order her to place an undergarment beneath it,
For I fear it will describe the size of her bones.'"
Narrated by Ahmad.
Al-Rafi‘i (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
"The meaning is that the Qubti garment, due to its thinness, clings to the body,
Revealing the size of the breasts and the buttocks,
And the firmness of the flesh of the upper arms and thighs,
So the onlooker knows—
The dimensions of these parts,
As if they were visible to his sight,
And accessible to his touch."
(Peace and blessings of Allah be upon him)
"These areas are like those describing what is behind them,
And informing of what is hidden by them."
This is one of the best expressions for this meaning.
And for this purpose, ‘Umar ibn al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him) warned—
In his saying:
"Beware of wearing Qubti garments,
For even if they do not show the skin, they describe the shape."
And Ahmad al-Sa‘ati (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
"A woman’s garment is either thick—
Meaning heavy and tight—
Describing the contours of the woman’s body,
Or it is thin, describing the color of her skin,
And both are not permissible.
The requirement is that a woman’s outer garment—
In front of people should be loose and thick,
Not describing body or skin."
So this woman was not naked in reality,
But she wore clothes that covered her skin,
Yet did not hide the size of her body—
And her charms.
And that is why, when Abu Zar‘ saw some of these charms,
He was tempted by her and married her.
So, will women accept this bitter truth?
Which is that the corruption of homes—
Is caused by immodest women,
The clothed yet naked, the seducing and the seduced,
And not by what Allah has legislated regarding the permissibility of polygyny.
Why do women remain silent—
About immodesty and do not denounce the immodest,
And do not show them the same hostility—
As they show to one who accepts being a second wife?
And can a woman, after knowing—
This legal ruling—
Which is the prohibition of wearing what outlines her body—
Make this blessed month—
A starting point to change her clothing in obedience to Allah?
Has the woman realized that a man—
Is tempted by her body just from its shape,
Even if he does not see it naked?
In fact, more than that,
A man might be tempted by imagining the woman’s form—
If it is described to him.
For on the authority of ‘Abdullah ibn Mas‘ud (may Allah be pleased with him), he said:
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:
"No woman should associate with another woman,
Then describe her to her husband as if he were looking at her."
Narrated by al-Bukhari.
Ibn Hajar (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
"The wisdom behind this prohibition—
Is the fear that the husband might be pleased with the description mentioned,
Which might lead to the divorcing of the one describing,
Or being tempted by the one described."
If this is the case with a description,
Then what will be the state of the man if he sees with his own eyes?
Second.
Did Abu Zar‘ err in his marriage to this woman—
Whose charms he saw?
This story and incident occurred before Islam,
So it is no wonder that the man’s concern—
Was the woman’s shape, her beauty, and her attractiveness.
Even though Abu Zar‘—
Had other reasons besides the shape,
Such as the nobility of the children,
And the woman’s energy and her performance of the tasks assigned to her.
But the blame lies with the Muslim man—
Who thinks only of the woman’s shape,
And her beauty at the expense of her religion—
And her character.
Nevertheless, for a man to proceed to marry—
A woman who has caught his eye—
Is better than falling into adultery.
He did not fall into sin when he married this woman,
Rather, he did himself a favor by preventing himself—
From falling into adultery.
The woman caused, in an indirect way,
His marriage to her.
But was she the cause of the divorce of Umm Zar‘?
And the question is for Muslim women today:
Would a woman be content with her husband—
Marrying a woman who has caught his eye?
We will continue in a future meeting, if Allah wills.
And praise be to Allah, Lord of the worlds.