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In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

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There is no harm in gentle reproach.

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For Allah, the Almighty and Majestic, in His Noble Qur'an,

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gently reproached His Prophet.

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And the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,

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would reproach his Companions.

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However, there are certain rules for reproach

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that must be observed.

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That is why it is said:

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Excessive blame breeds enmity and hatred,

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while abandoning reproach entirely leads to estrangement.

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It is like salt in food;

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if it exceeds its proper measure,

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it turns into its opposite.

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We have in the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,

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a beautiful example.

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Anas Ibn Malik, may Allah be pleased with him,

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the servant of the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,

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says:

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"I served the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, for ten years,

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and he never once said 'uff' to me.

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He never asked me regarding something I did, 'Why did you do it?'

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Nor regarding something I left undone, 'Why did you leave it?'"

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The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,

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was among the best of people in character.

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"I never touched silk or brocade,

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nor anything softer than the palm of the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him.

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And I never smelled musk,

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nor any perfume, more fragrant than the sweat of the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him."

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Therefore, one must be gentle in reproach.

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To eliminate it is a mistake,

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and to do it excessively is a mistake.

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Among the requirements of reproach

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is to clarify the error to the one you are reproaching, if they are indeed in the wrong.

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A second truth regarding reproach:

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Do not demand that others never make mistakes.

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For on the authority of Anas, may Allah be pleased with him, he said:

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The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said:

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"Every son of Adam is a sinner,

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and the best of sinners are those who repent."

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If you wish to reproach a brother of yours,

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use gentle words

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and kind, acceptable speech,

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for a good word is a charity.

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Reproach is an art that few have mastered.

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That is why we find many friends and loved ones

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losing one another due to their ignorance of the art of reproach.

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So, make the system of reproach between you and your brother

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a means of strengthening your relationship with him,

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and do not make it a cause for dispute.

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For if you were to reproach,

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let it be for the sake of goodness, righteousness, and virtue.

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So be as the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, was

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in his reproach:

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a soothing balm and a gentle touch,

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a means of upbringing and compassion,

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and a manifestation of truthfulness, pardon, appreciation, and respect.

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How beautiful is reproach between those who love one another!

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These are some of the rules of reproach;

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adhere to them if you are to be one who reproaches.