Our mother, Aisha | Episode (24) | Oh Aisha, where does the similarity come from?

0:00 Our mother ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her.

0:10 “O ‘A’ishah, and from where would the resemblance come?”

0:15 The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, praised modesty (haya’).

0:22 He said, “Modesty is entirely good.”

0:25 Narrated by Muslim.

0:27 He, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, also said,

0:30 “Modesty brings nothing but good.”

0:33 Narrated by al-Bukhari.

0:36 When the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, passed

0:39 by a man from the Ansar

0:41 who was admonishing his brother for being too modest,

0:45 he said to him,

0:46 “Leave him, for modesty is part of faith.”

0:49 Narrated by al-Bukhari.

0:52 If this is the description of modesty,

0:55 it cannot lead to the loss of rights

0:58 or the spread of ignorance among people,

1:01 especially since modesty is a branch of faith.

1:05 However, what some people fall into

1:08 is confusing modesty

1:10 with certain negative traits

1:13 that lead to the loss of rights and silence in the face of injustice,

1:17 such as fear, cowardice, and weakness.

1:19 They label these as modesty.

1:22 Al-Nawawi, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

1:25 “As for the statement that modesty is entirely good

1:28 and brings nothing but good,

1:30 some people may find this difficult to reconcile

1:32 because a modest person

1:35 might be too shy to confront someone they respect with the truth,

1:38 and thus abandon enjoining good and forbidding evil.

1:42 Modesty might also lead them

1:44 to fail to fulfill certain rights,

1:46 and other such things known in common custom.”

1:50 The answer to this is what a group of scholars provided,

1:55 among them Shaykh Abu ‘Umar Ibn al-Salah, may Allah have mercy on him:

1:58 “This obstacle we have mentioned

2:01 is not true modesty;

2:03 rather, it is incapacity, weakness, and baseness.

2:06 Its labeling as modesty is merely a colloquial usage by some,

2:11 applied metaphorically due to its resemblance to true modesty.

2:15 The reality of modesty is

2:18 a character trait that prompts one to abandon what is ugly

2:20 and prevents one from falling short in the rights of those who are entitled to them,

2:23 and the like.”

2:25 Abu Qatadah said:

2:27 “We were with ‘Imran Ibn Husayn in a group,

2:31 and among us was Bashir Ibn Ka‘b.

2:33 ‘Imran narrated to us that day,

2:36 and he said:

2:37 ‘The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said:

2:41 Modesty is entirely good.’”

2:43 Bashir Ibn Ka‘b said:

2:46 “We find in some books or wisdom

2:49 that part of it is tranquility and dignity for the sake of Allah,

2:53 and part of it is weakness.”

2:54 He said:

2:56 ‘Imran became so angry that his eyes turned red,

2:59 and he said:

3:00 “Do I not see myself narrating to you from the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,

3:05 and you are contradicting it?”

3:07 He said:

3:08 ‘Imran repeated the hadith.

3:11 He said:

3:12 Bashir repeated his objection.

3:13 ‘Imran became angry.

3:15 He said:

3:16 We kept saying to him,

3:18 “He is one of us, O Abu Nujayd,

3:21 there is no harm in him.”

3:23 Narrated by Muslim.

3:25 ‘Imran Ibn Husayn was angry with Bashir

3:29 for contradicting the hadith of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,

3:33 with what he found in the cultures of other nations.

3:37 The duty of the believer

3:39 is to submit to the words of the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,

3:43 with absolute submission,

3:45 and not to prioritize anyone’s opinion over his,

3:47 nor to contradict it with anything.

3:50 Modesty is an innate trait in women,

3:53 developing with them from a young age,

3:55 yet it is susceptible to alteration and change

3:59 according to the upbringing one receives in their primary environment,

4:04 or the effects of mixing with men in the various arenas of life.

4:09 Modesty increases and decreases in both men and women,

4:13 and the fortunate one is he who increases in modesty

4:16 and increases in faith.

4:19 In a beautiful story

4:21 that took place in the presence of ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her,

4:24 the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, utilized it to teach and nurture ‘A’ishah,

4:31 while answering the question of the Ansari woman.

4:35 From ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her:

4:38 Umm Sulaym the Ansari woman said:

4:41 “O Messenger of Allah,

4:43 Allah, the Almighty, is not shy of the truth.

4:47 Does a woman have to perform ghusl if she sees in a dream what a man sees?”

4:51 “Does she have to perform ghusl or not?”

4:53 ‘A’ishah said:

4:55 The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said:

4:58 “Yes,

4:59 she must perform ghusl if she sees the fluid.”

5:03 ‘A’ishah said:

5:04 I turned to her

5:06 and said, “Shame on you!

5:08 Does a woman actually see that?”

5:11 The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, turned to me and said:

5:16 “May your right hand be rubbed with dust, O ‘A’ishah!

5:18 From where would the resemblance come?”

5:21 Narrated by Muslim.

5:23 This story contains several educational benefits:

5:27 Among them is the sagacity and intelligence of Umm Sulaym,

5:30 as she prefaced her question with an introduction that would excuse her for what she wanted to mention,

5:36 which a woman would normally be shy to mention in front of men.

5:39 She said:

5:41 “Allah, the Almighty, is not shy of the truth.”

5:45 Al-Nawawi, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

5:48 “The scholars said:

5:49 Its meaning is that He does not refrain from explaining the truth,

5:52 or from setting forth a parable of a mosquito or something similar,

5:56 as He, the Glorified and Exalted, said:

5:59 “Lo! Allah disdaineth not to coin the similitude even of a gnat. Those who believe know that it is the truth from their Lord; but those who disbelieve say: What doth Allah wish (to teach) by such a similitude? He misleadeth many thereby, and He guideth many thereby; and He misleadeth thereby only miscreants;” (2:26)

6:11 Thus, I do not refrain from asking about what I am in need of.”

6:17 It was also said that its meaning is:

6:19 “Allah does not command modesty regarding the truth, nor does He permit it.”

6:23 She said this as an apology before her question

6:27 regarding what she needed to know,

6:29 which women are usually shy to ask about

6:33 or mention in the presence of men.

6:36 Among the benefits is the eagerness of the female Companions to gain understanding in the religion.

6:40 Ibn ‘Abd al-Barr, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

6:43 “In this hadith

6:44 is a clarification of the state of the women of that time,

6:48 in their concern for the affairs of their religion

6:50 and asking about them.

6:52 This is incumbent upon every believing man and woman:

6:55 if they are ignorant of something in their religion, they must ask about it.”

6:59 Among the benefits is that modesty does not prevent one from seeking knowledge.

7:03 Al-Nawawi, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

7:06 “It indicates that whoever encounters an issue should ask about it,

7:11 and not refrain from asking out of shyness to mention it,

7:15 for that is not true modesty,

7:18 because modesty is entirely good,

7:20 and modesty brings nothing but good.

7:24 Refraining from asking in this situation is not good;

7:28 rather, it is evil.

7:29 So how could it be modesty?”

7:32 Among the benefits is the permissibility of a woman asking a chaste scholar about her religious affairs,

7:37 even if it is something one is usually shy to mention.

7:41 Among the benefits is

7:43 the use of beautiful language to express one’s intent without obscenity,

7:48 as Umm Sulaym said:

7:50 “Does a woman have to perform ghusl if she sees in a dream what a man sees?”

7:54 “Does she have to perform ghusl or not?”

7:57 Among the benefits is

7:58 that women are the counterparts of men

8:01 regarding the issue of nocturnal emission and what follows from it.

8:05 Among the benefits is correcting the one who is mistaken

8:07 and rectifying their opinion with evidence and proof.

8:11 ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, disapproved of Umm Sulaym’s question,

8:16 so the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, corrected her

8:20 and explained the truth of the matter to her.

8:23 Among the benefits is using rational deduction for religious issues,

8:27 for the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said to ‘A’ishah,

8:32 in explaining that a woman experiences nocturnal emission and sees the fluid,

8:35 by saying:

8:36 “And from where would the resemblance come?”

8:39 Among the benefits is that a woman who asks about her religion,

8:43 even regarding issues that are considered shameful,

8:46 is acting in a praiseworthy manner,

8:48 and it is not permissible to admonish, discourage,

8:51 or condemn her action.

8:53 The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, defended Umm Sulaym

8:57 for her question about nocturnal emission,

9:00 which is when a woman sees in her dream what a man sees

9:04 of full intimacy between her and a man.

9:09 ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, praised the women of the Ansar,

9:13 saying:

9:15 “How excellent are the women of the Ansar!

9:18 Modesty did not prevent them from gaining understanding in the religion.”

9:22 O Allah, grant us understanding in Your religion,

9:25 teach us what benefits us,

9:27 benefit us with what You have taught us, and increase us in knowledge.

9:32 We will continue in a future meeting, if Allah wills.

9:36 And praise be to Allah, Lord of the worlds.

9:42 Our mother ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her.

Our mother, Aisha | Episode (24) | Oh Aisha, where does the similarity come from?

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