Our mother, Aisha | Episode (14) | Oh Aisha, what makes you cry?

0:00 Our Mother ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her.

0:04 "O ‘A’ishah, what makes you weep?"

0:16 The way the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, treated his wives, the Mothers of the Believers,

0:22 is the most refined example of conduct between a husband and his wife.

0:26 Anyone who wishes to learn the art of interaction between spouses

0:30 must study how our Prophet, peace be upon him, treated his wives.

0:36 For this is the supreme ideal for all married couples.

0:39 Among the beautiful examples of the interaction between the Prophet, peace be upon him, and his wife ‘A’ishah

0:47 is what she experienced while with him during the Farewell Pilgrimage.

0:53 ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, says:

0:56 "We set out with the intention of Hajj."

0:58 "When we reached Sarif, I began to menstruate."

1:02 "The Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, came to me while I was weeping."

1:07 "He asked, 'What makes you weep, O ‘A’ishah?'"

1:11 "I replied, 'I wish I had not performed Hajj this year.'"

1:16 "He said, 'Subhan Allah!'"

1:19 "'This is something that Allah, the Almighty, has decreed for the daughters of Adam.'"

1:24 "'Perform all the rites of the pilgrimage, except that you should not circumambulate the House (the Ka‘bah).'"

1:29 "She said, 'When we entered Makkah,'"

1:32 "the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, said:"

1:36 "'Whoever wishes to change their intention to ‘Umrah, let them do so,'"

1:40 "'unless they have the sacrificial animal with them.'"

1:43 "She said, 'The Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, sacrificed cows on behalf of his wives on the Day of Sacrifice.'"

1:51 "When we reached the night at al-Batha’, I had become pure (my period had ended)."

1:55 "I said, 'O Messenger of Allah,'"

1:58 "'will my companions return with both Hajj and ‘Umrah,'"

2:01 "'while I return with only Hajj?'"

2:04 "He then commanded ‘Abd al-Rahman Ibn Abi Bakr,"

2:07 "and he took me to al-Tan‘im, where I entered into the state of ihram for ‘Umrah."

2:11 Narrated by Ahmad.

2:13 Our Mother ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her,

2:16 was listening to the sermon of the Prophet, peace be upon him, to his Companions,

2:21 in which he encouraged them to convert their Hajj into an ‘Umrah.

2:25 However, she was surprised by the onset of her menstruation

2:28 while she was at Sarif, near Makkah.

2:31 This meant she would be unable to perform ‘Umrah,

2:35 as the time remaining until the Day of ‘Arafah was short,

2:39 and menstruation has its own duration.

2:41 Our Mother ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, realized

2:44 that she would not be able to perform ‘Umrah.

2:47 As she heard the Prophet, peace be upon him, encouraging his Companions

2:51 to convert their pilgrimage into an ‘Umrah,

2:53 she wept.

2:55 The Prophet, peace be upon him, came to her

2:58 while she was weeping,

3:00 and he comforted her to understand the reason for her tears.

3:03 He asked,

3:04 "What makes you weep, O ‘A’ishah?"

3:07 The weeping of ‘A’ishah when she began her period

3:10 occurred because of the distress and sadness she felt at missing the ‘Umrah.

3:16 This is a reason that men might not quickly grasp,

3:20 and a man might not pay much attention to it,

3:22 because he views menstruation as a natural occurrence for every woman.

3:27 And it is indeed so.

3:29 However, a woman may be in a psychological state

3:32 where she is deeply affected by the onset of her period,

3:35 such as a woman who has been waiting to conceive and is disappointed when it does not happen,

3:39 so she weeps when her period arrives,

3:42 or for any other reason.

3:44 Thus, the action of the Prophet, peace be upon him, with ‘A’ishah

3:49 serves as guidance for husbands on the art of dealing with a woman in such a state.

3:55 The Prophet, peace be upon him, did not stop

3:58 at merely asking her the reason for her weeping;

4:01 rather, he eased the matter for her

4:03 by explaining that she was not the only one afflicted with this menstruation,

4:09 but that it is the case for all daughters of Adam.

4:11 He said,

4:13 "This is a matter that Allah has decreed for the daughters of Adam."

4:17 Al-Qurtubi said: "Meaning menstruation."

4:20 "And He decreed it upon them,"

4:22 meaning He created them with this nature,

4:24 and established it for them.

4:26 This was a way of comforting and consoling her,

4:29 and it is evidence of his inclination toward her and his tenderness for her.

4:33 Ibn Rajab, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

4:36 "He ordained it for them and bound them to it."

4:40 "Thus, they are rewarded for their patience with it."

4:43 The Prophet, peace be upon him, calmed her distress with two points:

4:49 First, that menstruation is a matter Allah has decreed for women in general;

4:55 and second, that she is like them,

4:58 experiencing what they experience.

5:01 After the Prophet, peace be upon him, calmed our Mother ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her,

5:08 he moved to another dimension of psychological comfort for her.

5:13 He explained to her that the onset of menstruation for a woman in the state of ihram does not harm her,

5:18 nor does it affect her ihram.

5:21 Then the Prophet, peace be upon him, instructed her on what to do in her situation,

5:27 saying:

5:29 "Perform all the rites of the pilgrimage, except that you should not circumambulate the House."

5:34 Al-Bukhari titled this hadith in his Sahih by saying:

5:38 "The menstruating woman performs all the rites except circumambulation of the House."

5:43 Ibn Rajab, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

5:45 "The intention of al-Bukhari in this chapter"

5:48 "is that menstruation does not prevent any of the rites of Hajj,"

5:52 "except for circumambulation of the House and the prayer following it."

5:56 "As for everything else, such as standing (at ‘Arafah), dhikr, and supplication,"

6:00 "menstruation does not prevent any of it."

6:03 "The menstruating woman performs all of that."

6:06 "This includes standing at ‘Arafah and Muzdalifah,"

6:10 "stoning the pillars, and remembering Allah, the Almighty,"

6:13 "and supplicating to Him in these places."

6:16 "All of this is unanimously agreed to be permissible."

6:19 Ibn al-Mulaqqin, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

6:22 "Regarding the menstruating woman witnessing all the rites,"

6:26 "and her saying the takbir during the two ‘Eids,"

6:28 "is evidence for the permissibility of her reciting the Qur'an,"

6:31 "because it is from the Sunnah to remember Allah during the rites."

6:35 A woman in Ramadan

6:37 may be anxious about the arrival of her monthly cycle,

6:41 especially in the last ten nights,

6:44 due to her intense desire for worship, reading the Qur'an,

6:48 and seizing the season of goodness.

6:50 She might resort to using certain medications

6:53 that delay the onset of menstruation,

6:55 which are rarely free from harm

6:58 to her health and psychological state.

7:00 These medications may even cause

7:03 a disruption in the woman's cycle,

7:06 resulting in discharge of various colors,

7:08 which leaves her in a state of confusion,

7:11 not knowing whether she is menstruating or pure.

7:16 If only the woman would remember

7:18 the words of the Prophet, peace be upon him,

7:20 to ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her:

7:23 "That is something Allah has decreed for the daughters of Adam."

7:27 "So do what the pilgrim does,"

7:29 "except do not circumambulate the House until you are pure."

7:33 If she were to be content with what Allah has decreed for her regarding menstruation

7:36 at the time Allah has ordained for her,

7:39 and then perform what the fasting person does

7:41 of righteousness and good deeds during this month,

7:44 except that she does not fast or pray,

7:47 it would be better for her than these medications

7:50 that may harm her without her realizing it.

7:53 Among the ways the Prophet, peace be upon him, pleased

7:56 the heart of ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her,

7:59 was that he, peace be upon him,

8:02 when he departed from Mina after stoning the pillars,

8:05 stopped at al-Muhassab,

8:07 which is a place between Mina and the Sacred Mosque,

8:10 and prayed there the Dhuhr, ‘Asr,

8:13 Maghrib, and ‘Isha’ prayers.

8:15 When evening came,

8:17 ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, spoke with him

8:20 regarding the matter of her rites.

8:22 She said, "O Messenger of Allah,"

8:25 "will my companions return with both Hajj and ‘Umrah,"

8:28 "while I return with only Hajj?"

8:31 The Prophet, peace be upon him, tried

8:34 to convince her that it had been written for her.

8:37 He said to her,

8:39 "Your circumambulation of the House and between al-Safa and al-Marwah"

8:42 "suffices for both your Hajj and your ‘Umrah."

8:45 Narrated by Abu Dawud.

8:47 But she refused and said, "O Messenger of Allah,"

8:50 "you have performed ‘Umrah, but I have not."

8:53 "O Messenger of Allah,"

8:55 "the people return with two rewards,"

8:57 "while I return with one."

8:59 "O Messenger of Allah,"

9:01 "the people depart with two rites,"

9:03 "while I depart with only one."

9:05 "O Messenger of Allah,"

9:07 "your Companions return with the reward of Hajj and ‘Umrah,"

9:10 "while I have not added anything to the Hajj."

9:12 "Will your wives return with Hajj and ‘Umrah,"

9:15 "while I return with Hajj that has no ‘Umrah with it?"

9:19 Ibn Taymiyyah, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

9:22 "When she persisted,"

9:24 "he allowed her to perform ‘Umrah to comfort her heart."

9:27 And Ibn al-Qayyim, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

9:30 "She felt in herself"

9:32 "that her companions would return"

9:34 "with a separate Hajj and ‘Umrah,"

9:36 "as they were performing Tamattu‘,"

9:39 "and they did not menstruate nor were they performing Qiran,"

9:42 "while she would return with an ‘Umrah included within her Hajj."

9:46 "So he commanded her brother to take her to perform ‘Umrah from al-Tan‘im"

9:49 "to soothe her heart."

9:52 This is an example from the fragrant Seerah

9:55 of the Prophet, peace be upon him,

9:58 expressing the beauty of his conduct, peace be upon him,

10:02 with ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her.

10:05 And his entire Seerah is beautiful.

10:08 We shall continue in a future meeting, if Allah wills.

10:11 And praise be to Allah, Lord of the worlds.

10:14 Our Mother ‘A’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her.

Our mother, Aisha | Episode (14) | Oh Aisha, what makes you cry?

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