Types of men in the hadith of Umm Zara’ | Episode (14) | My husband touched a rabbit

0:00 In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

0:03 Categories of Husbands in the Hadith of Umm Zar'.

0:13 The husband whose touch is as soft as a hare.

0:20 After listening to the previous women describe their husbands in praise and dispraise,

0:30 the eighth woman proudly extolled her husband using brief yet deeply eloquent words.

0:35 She said:

0:37 "My husband's touch is as soft as the touch of a hare,

0:40 and his scent is as fragrant as the scent of zarnab (sweet basil)."

0:43 She did not speak at length,

0:44 but rather conveyed immense depth in her description,

0:47 leaving the other women to ponder the beautiful meanings carried by these few expressions

0:54 and this eloquent characterization.

0:56 A hare and a sweet breeze share several qualities,

1:00 including the delicate softness that delights whoever feels them.

1:04 It was part of this woman's refined eloquence

1:07 that she offered general praise without delving into minute details.

1:11 I believe that had she elaborated,

1:14 she would have listed numerous praiseworthy qualities

1:16 that were already encapsulated within this eloquent description.

1:20 Indeed, going into elaborate details when praising a husband among women

1:23 may bring sorrow to the heart of a woman deprived of such fine traits in her own husband.

1:27 She might then fall into envy,

1:29 or grieve over missing out on such a man,

1:33 or covet him,

1:34 especially if she is unmarried;

1:38 or she may become oblivious to her husband’s good qualities

1:40 by focusing on the merits of another man,

1:42 thus being ungrateful for the blessings she actually enjoys.

1:46 Perfection among men is rare,

1:49 so how much rarer is it among women?

1:51 Thus, the advice to any sensible woman

1:54 is not to talk excessively among other women

1:56 about the intimate, beautiful details she shares with her husband.

2:01 However, in this modern era, we have been afflicted

2:04 by what is known as social media.

2:07 It is a blessing

2:08 that has been misused

2:10 by those whose minds have been consumed

2:12 by a craving for fame and showing off before others.

2:15 They photograph every single moment of their lives

2:18 and broadcast it across these platforms,

2:21 which reflects the intellectual level

2:23 and superficial concerns to which some people have descended,

2:27 as well as the dominance of a culture of triviality over people's lives.

2:32 This sensible woman, however,

2:34 praised her husband in merely two short sentences.

2:38 If we were to ask women today

2:40 to praise their husbands in two sentences,

2:44 they would scarcely be able to do so, except for those upon whom Allah shows mercy.

2:48 So consider how magnificent was this description

2:50 crafted by the eighth woman when she said:

2:53 "My husband's touch is as soft as the touch of a hare,

2:56 and his scent is as fragrant as the scent of zarnab."

2:58 It contained a vast multitude of virtues

3:00 that this woman embedded within this concise description.

3:04 Abu 'Ubayd al-Harawi, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

3:08 "She describes him as possessing good character and a gentle demeanor,

3:11 like the touch of a hare when you place your hand upon its back."

3:16 Al-Qadi 'Iyad, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

3:19 "She describes her husband as being gentle with his family,

3:23 having excellent manners, and treating them with kindness,

3:26 akin to touching a hare due to its soft feel

3:29 and the tenderness of its fur."

3:32 Ibn Dizil, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

3:35 "Regarding her statement, 'his touch is as soft as the touch of a hare,'

3:39 she means he is gentle in temperament,

3:42 because the touch of a hare is gentle and soft."

3:46 Thus, the woman described her husband with two main traits:

3:50 the first is that he is easygoing and gentle,

3:53 which is a highly praised quality in Islam.

3:57 Several hadiths have been narrated

4:00 in commendation of those who embody it, including:

4:03 On the authority of Ibn Mas'ud (may Allah be pleased with him), who said:

4:06 The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:

4:10 "Shall I not inform you of whom the Fire is forbidden to touch,

4:13 or who is forbidden from the Fire?

4:16 It is forbidden for every easygoing, gentle, approachable, and accommodating person."

4:21 Narrated by Ibn Abi Shaybah.

4:24 An easygoing and gentle person

4:26 embodies numerous virtues, all of which are noble,

4:30 such as smiling, tolerance,

4:34 speaking good words,

4:36 and loving to bring joy to people's hearts.

4:40 As for smiling,

4:41 it is meeting people with a cheerful and beaming countenance.

4:45 The most deserving person of such a cheerful countenance

4:47 is the woman this gentle man chose

4:51 to be his companion in this life,

4:53 spending his wealth to make her content,

4:56 and exhausting himself in hard labor

4:59 for the sake of her happiness.

5:02 The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:

5:05 "Your smiling in the face of your brother is charity."

5:09 Narrated by al-Bukhari in Al-Adab al-Mufrad.

5:13 Your wife looks at your face more than anyone else does,

5:16 so smile at her often.

5:19 By doing so, your good deeds will multiply while you are in your own home,

5:22 you will make her happy and bring joy to her heart,

5:26 and through her you will attain the most beloved of deeds to Allah.

5:30 As mentioned in the hadith of Ibn 'Umar (may Allah be pleased with them both):

5:34 A man came to the Prophet (peace be upon him)

5:38 and said, "O Messenger of Allah,

5:41 which people are most beloved to Allah,

5:44 and which deeds are most beloved to Allah?"

5:47 The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) replied:

5:51 "The most beloved of people to Allah Almighty

5:54 are those who are most beneficial to others,

5:56 and the most beloved deed to Allah Almighty

5:59 is bringing joy to the heart of a fellow Muslim."

6:03 Narrated by al-Tabarani in Al-Mu'jam al-Kabir.

6:06 And your wife is the most deserving of having joy brought to her heart.

6:11 As for tolerance and leniency,

6:13 it is inconceivable for an easygoing, gentle man

6:16 to be harsh and severe.

6:19 Rather, he is expected to be lenient and magnanimous in dealing with those around him,

6:23 and the most entitled to such magnanimity

6:26 are the members of his household.

6:28 It is also a sign of his faith,

6:30 as narrated in the hadith of Jabir ibn 'Abdillah (may Allah be pleased with them both), who said:

6:36 The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) was asked about faith,

6:41 and he replied:

6:42 "Patience and magnanimity."

6:44 Narrated by Abu Ya'la.

6:47 Magnanimity in dealing with people in general,

6:51 and with one's own family in particular,

6:53 is a means of entering Paradise and attaining the forgiveness of Allah.

6:58 As mentioned in the hadith of 'Abdullah ibn 'Umar (may Allah be pleased with them both), who said:

7:03 The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:

7:07 "A man entered Paradise on account of his leniency, both when demanding his rights and when fulfilling them."

7:13 Narrated by Ahmad.

7:15 Among the requirements of gentleness and magnanimity

7:17 is speaking good words,

7:19 concerning which the Prophet (peace be upon him) said:

7:24 "A good word is charity."

7:27 Narrated by Ahmad.

7:29 All of these noble qualities are encompassed by her statement:

7:33 "His touch is as soft as the touch of a hare."

7:35 The second quality with which she praised him

7:38 was his pleasant fragrance.

7:41 Abu 'Ubayd al-Harawi, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

7:44 "Regarding her statement:

7:45 'and his scent is as fragrant as the scent of zarnab,'

7:47 it carries two possible meanings:

7:50 she might have meant the pleasant fragrance of his body,

7:53 or she might have meant his excellent reputation among people

7:56 and its widespread renown, resembling the fragrance of zarnab,

7:59 which is a well-known type of sweet perfume."

8:03 Al-Qadi 'Iyad, may Allah have mercy on him, said:

8:07 "As for her likening him to the scent of zarnab,

8:10 it has several interpretations:

8:12 first,

8:13 that she meant the excellence and widespread reach of his reputation among people;

8:19 second,

8:20 that she meant the pleasant scent of his body and the sweet fragrance of his garments;

8:24 and third,

8:26 that she meant his mild temperament and good character,

8:30 which would align with the meaning of the first clause."

8:34 As for the first meaning—

8:36 which is people’s praise for him,

8:39 often expressed as his fragrant biography and reputation among people—

8:43 this harmonizes perfectly with his being easygoing and gentle.

8:48 For people testify to a man's character based on what is known of him.

8:51 On the authority of Anas ibn Malik (may Allah be pleased with him), who said:

8:55 A funeral procession passed by,

8:57 and the people spoke well of the deceased.

8:59 The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:

9:03 "It has become binding."

9:04 Then another funeral procession passed by,

9:06 and the people spoke ill of the deceased.

9:08 The Prophet said:

9:10 "It has become binding."

9:11 'Umar ibn al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him) asked,

9:14 "What has become binding?"

9:16 He replied:

9:17 "This one you praised with good,

9:20 so Paradise has become binding for him;

9:23 and this one you spoke ill of,

9:26 so the Fire has become binding for him.

9:28 You are Allah's witnesses on earth."

9:32 Narrated by al-Bukhari.

9:34 As for the second meaning,

9:36 it refers to the pleasant fragrance of his body.

9:38 This is something naturally beloved to all souls,

9:41 and to a wife in particular.

9:43 It means that he smells good

9:46 due to the perfume he uses

9:49 and his meticulous attention to personal hygiene.

9:53 The Prophet (peace be upon him)

9:56 was fond of pleasant fragrance,

9:58 as stated in the hadith of Anas (may Allah be pleased with him), who said:

10:03 The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:

10:06 "Made dear to me from your worldly life

10:09 are women and perfume,

10:11 and the delight of my eye has been placed in prayer."

10:14 Narrated by Ahmad.

10:16 Are you, O husband of an honorable wife,

10:19 among this category of easygoing, gentle, and magnanimous men—

10:22 a person of kind words and pleasant scent?

10:27 I hope that you are among them.

10:29 Glad tidings to any woman whose husband is of this sort!

10:35 We will continue in our next gathering, if Allah wills.

10:38 And all praise is due to Allah, the Lord of all the worlds.

Types of men in the hadith of Umm Zara’ | Episode (14) | My husband touched a rabbit

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