Riyadh Al-Salehin | Episode (162) | Chapter on what is permissible through backbiting

0:00 Riyad al-Salihin (The Meadows of the Righteous) from the words of the Master of the Messengers, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him.

0:09 Chapter: The Prohibition of Listening to Backbiting (Ghibah).

0:15 It is commanded that whoever hears prohibited backbiting must refute it and rebuke the speaker.

0:21 If one is unable to do so, or if the speaker does not accept the rebuke, one must leave that gathering if possible.

0:28 Allah the Exalted says:

0:30 "And when they hear ill speech, they turn away from it."

0:33 And He the Exalted says:

0:36 “And who shun vain conversation,” (23:3)

0:40 And He the Exalted says:

0:42 “(O man), follow not that whereof thou hast no knowledge. Lo! the hearing and the sight and the heart - of each of these it will be asked.” (17:36)

0:49 And He the Exalted says:

0:51 “And when thou seest those who meddle with Our revelations, withdraw from them until they meddle with another topic. And if the devil cause thee to forget, sit not, after the remembrance, with the congregation of wrong-doers.” (6:68)

1:00 "And if Satan should make you forget, then after the reminder, do not sit with the wrongdoing people."

1:08 On the authority of Abu al-Darda’, may Allah be pleased with him:

1:12 From the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, who said:

1:16 "Whoever defends the honor of his brother,

1:19 Allah will defend his face from the Fire on the Day of Resurrection."

1:23 Narrated by al-Tirmidhi.

1:26 From the benefits of the hadith:

1:29 It is incumbent upon anyone who hears the backbiting of a Muslim to refute it and restrain the speaker.

1:35 Whoever cannot do so must leave the gathering.

1:39 Defending a Muslim and protecting his honor is a path to salvation from the punishment of Hell on the Day of Resurrection.

1:47 It contains a statement regarding the immense merit of one who prevents backbiting and deters the backbiter.

1:53 The magnification of the sanctity of a Muslim.

1:55 And a statement of the gravity of the sin of one who violates it, whether by word or deed.

2:00 The Muslim community is cohesive, like a solid structure,

2:05 Supporting one another.

2:08 Because Muslims are brothers in faith.

2:12 On the authority of 'Itban ibn Malik, may Allah be pleased with him,

2:16 In his long, famous hadith which preceded in the Chapter of Hope:

2:21 He said: The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, stood to pray,

2:27 And said: "Where is Malik ibn al-Dukhshum?"

2:31 A man said: "That is a hypocrite who does not love Allah or His Messenger."

2:38 The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said:

2:41 "Do not say that.

2:44 Do you not see that he has said, 'There is no god but Allah,'

2:48 Seeking thereby the Countenance of Allah?

2:51 And indeed, Allah has forbidden the Fire to anyone who says, 'There is no god but Allah,'

2:57 Seeking thereby the Countenance of Allah."

3:00 Agreed upon.

3:03 On the authority of Ka'b ibn Malik, may Allah be pleased with him, in his long hadith

3:08 Regarding the story of his repentance,

3:10 Which has already passed in the Chapter of Repentance:

3:13 He said:

3:14 The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said,

3:17 While he was sitting among the people in Tabuk:

3:20 "What has Ka'b ibn Malik done?"

3:23 A man from Banu Salamah said:

3:26 "O Messenger of Allah,

3:28 His two garments and his looking at his own sides have detained him."

3:32 Mu'adh ibn Jabal, may Allah be pleased with him, said to him:

3:36 "What a terrible thing you have said!

3:38 By Allah, O Messenger of Allah,

3:40 We have known of him nothing but good."

3:43 The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, remained silent.

3:47 Agreed upon.

3:49 "Sides" means his flanks.

3:52 It is an indication of his self-admiration.

3:56 Chapter: What is Permissible of Backbiting.

4:03 Know that backbiting is permissible for a valid, Shari'ah-based purpose

4:08 That cannot be achieved otherwise.

4:12 It is for six reasons:

4:14 First: Seeking redress for a grievance.

4:17 It is permissible for the oppressed to complain to the ruler, the judge, or others who have authority or the ability to grant him justice against his oppressor.

4:27 He says: "So-and-so wronged me by doing such-and-such."

4:33 Second: Seeking assistance in changing an evil and bringing the sinner back to the truth.

4:40 He says to someone he hopes has the power to remove the evil:

4:44 "So-and-so is doing such-and-such,

4:47 So rebuke him for it," and the like.

4:50 His intention must be to reach the goal of removing the evil.

4:54 If he does not intend that, it is forbidden.

4:58 Third: Seeking a legal ruling (fatwa).

5:01 He says to the mufti:

5:04 "My father, brother, husband, or so-and-so has wronged me by doing such-and-such.

5:09 Is he allowed to do that?

5:11 What is my way to be free from him,

5:14 Obtain my right, and repel the injustice?" and the like.

5:18 This is permissible due to necessity.

5:21 However, it is more cautious and better to say:

5:24 "What do you say about a man, a person, or a husband whose situation was such-and-such?"

5:31 For the purpose is achieved without naming the person.

5:35 Nevertheless, naming is permissible,

5:38 As we will mention in the hadith of Hind, if Allah the Exalted wills.

5:43 Fourth: Warning Muslims against evil and advising them.

5:49 This is in several forms:

5:51 Among them is criticizing the narrators and witnesses who are unreliable.

5:55 This is permissible by the consensus of the Muslims,

5:59 Indeed, it is mandatory due to necessity.

6:01 Among them is consulting regarding marrying someone, entering into a partnership with them,

6:06 Entrusting them with something, dealing with them, or living near them.

6:12 It is mandatory for the one being consulted not to hide the person's condition,

6:16 But rather to mention the faults in the spirit of sincere advice.

6:20 Among them is if one sees a student of knowledge frequenting an innovator,

6:25 Or a corrupt person, to learn from him,

6:28 And he fears that the student will be harmed by that,

6:31 Then he must advise him by clarifying the person's state,

6:35 On the condition that he intends sincere advice.

6:38 This is something in which people err.

6:41 The speaker might be driven by envy,

6:44 And Satan confuses him in this,

6:47 Making him imagine that it is sincere advice.

6:50 So one must be alert to this.

6:53 Among them is if someone holds a position of authority but does not fulfill it properly,

6:58 Either because he is not fit for it,

7:02 Or because he is corrupt, negligent, or the like.

7:07 It is mandatory to mention this to those who have general authority over him,

7:12 So that they may remove him and appoint someone who is fit,

7:15 Or so that they know his state to deal with him accordingly and not be deceived by him,

7:21 And to strive to urge him toward uprightness,

7:25 Or replace him.

7:29 That he is openly committing sin or innovation,

7:33 Such as one who openly drinks alcohol or seizes people's property,

7:37 Collects illegal taxes, or extorts money unjustly,

7:41 Or assumes invalid positions.

7:44 It is permissible to mention him regarding what he does openly,

7:47 But it is forbidden to mention him regarding other faults,

7:50 Unless there is another reason for its permissibility among those we mentioned.

7:58 If a person is known by a title,

8:01 Such as "the bleary-eyed," "the lame," "the deaf,"

8:04 "The blind," "the cross-eyed," and others,

8:07 It is permissible to identify them by that.

8:09 But it is forbidden to use it to belittle them.

8:13 If it were possible to identify them by other means, that would be better.

8:18 These are six reasons mentioned by the scholars,

8:22 And most of them are agreed upon.

8:24 Their proofs are from the famous, authentic hadiths.

8:29 Among them:

8:31 On the authority of 'A'ishah, may Allah be pleased with her,

8:36 That a man asked permission to see the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,

8:41 And he said: "Give him permission; he is a bad member of his tribe."

8:46 Agreed upon.

8:48 Al-Bukhari used this as evidence for the permissibility of backbiting the people of corruption and suspicion.

8:56 From the benefits of the hadith:

8:58 The permissibility of mentioning the people of corruption and suspicion.

9:02 That is why al-Bukhari titled a chapter:

9:05 "Chapter: What is permissible of backbiting the people of corruption and suspicion."

9:11 One who openly commits sin and evil,

9:13 What is mentioned about him regarding that behind his back is not considered blameworthy backbiting.

9:19 The statement of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, regarding his Ummah concerning matters he names them with,

9:26 And attributes to them of disliked things,

9:28 Is not considered backbiting.

9:30 Every person who knows of an obscenity in another,

9:34 And sees that a third party will be deceived by this immoral person,

9:38 Must advise him, admonish him, and warn him against him.

9:44 On the authority of 'A'ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, she said:

9:47 The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said:

9:51 "I do not think that so-and-so and so-and-so know anything of our religion."

9:57 Narrated by al-Bukhari.

9:59 Layth ibn Sa'd, one of the narrators of this hadith, said:

10:04 "These two men were among the hypocrites."

10:09 From the benefits of the hadith:

10:11 The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, did not know all the hypocrites,

10:18 Because he said it based on conjecture.

10:21 A statement that some conjecture is permissible,

10:24 Because it is in the context of warning,

10:27 Like the situation of the two men.

10:30 That is why al-Bukhari titled it in the Book of Etiquette:

10:34 "Chapter: What is permissible of conjecture."

10:37 The permissibility of exposing the state of one known for hypocrisy.

10:42 The forbidden conjecture

10:44 Is only the evil assumption about a Muslim who is sound in his religion and honor.

10:52 On the authority of Fatimah bint Qays, may Allah be pleased with her, she said:

10:56 I came to the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, and said:

11:01 "Abu al-Jahm and Mu'awiyah have proposed to me."

11:05 The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said:

11:09 "As for Mu'awiyah, he is a pauper with no wealth.

11:14 As for Abu al-Jahm, he does not put down his staff from his shoulder."

11:19 Agreed upon.

11:21 In a narration by Muslim:

11:23 "As for Abu al-Jahm, he is a beater of women."

11:28 This is an explanation of the narration "he does not put down his staff from his shoulder."

11:33 It is also said it means he travels a lot.

11:37 "Pauper" means the poor.

11:43 From the benefits of the hadith:

11:46 The permissibility of hearing the speech of a non-mahram woman and man in seeking a legal ruling and the like.

11:52 The permissibility of proposing to a woman who has already received a proposal,

11:55 If the first suitor has not received an answer.

11:59 The permissibility of mentioning the absent person with the faults he dislikes,

12:04 If it is for the sake of sincere advice.

12:06 It is not then considered forbidden backbiting,

12:10 Because whoever is consulted

12:12 Is obligated to speak the truth and offer sincere advice.

12:16 This is not from the category of backbiting,

12:19 Because he did not intend by it to mock him, satisfy his rage, or cause harm.

12:25 The recommendation of guiding a person to his best interest, even if he dislikes it.

12:30 Accepting the advice of people of virtue,

12:33 And submitting to their guidance,

12:36 For its outcome is praiseworthy.

12:40 The recommendation of preferring a suitor who is wealthy for his family.

12:46 The recommendation of preferring a suitor who beats his wife little or travels little,

12:52 Based on the interpretation that "he does not put down his staff from his shoulder" means he travels a lot.

12:58 It is permissible for the one consulted to suggest someone other than those he was asked about,

13:03 Because the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, suggested Usamah,

13:07 Even though she only mentioned Abu al-Jahm and Mu'awiyah to him.

13:12 On the authority of Zayd ibn Arqam, may Allah be pleased with him, he said:

13:17 We went out with the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, on a journey in which the people suffered hardship.

13:25 'Abdullah ibn Ubayy said:

13:28 “They it is who say: Spend not on behalf of those (who dwell) with Allah's messenger that they may disperse (and go away from you); when Allah's are the treasures of the heavens and the earth; but the hypocrites comprehend not.” (63:7)

13:33 And he said:

13:34 “They say: Surely, if we return to Al-Madinah the mightier will soon drive out the weaker; when might belongeth to Allah and to His messenger and to the believers; but the hypocrites know not.” (63:8)

13:40 I came to the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, and informed him of that.

13:46 So he sent for 'Abdullah ibn Ubayy,

13:49 And he swore his hardest oaths that he did not do it.

13:52 They said,

13:53 "Zayd has lied about the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him."

13:58 This caused me great distress,

14:02 until Allah the Exalted revealed my vindication:

14:06 "When the hypocrites come to you..."

14:09 Then the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, called them to seek forgiveness for them,

14:14 but they turned their heads away.

14:18 It is agreed upon by the scholars regarding the interpretation of this.

14:21 "They turned away" means they dispersed from him.

14:25 "Distress" means severe anguish.

14:28 "Turned" means they tilted their heads in aversion.

14:32 Among the benefits of the hadith:

14:36 The permissibility of overlooking the slips of the leaders of a community,

14:40 so that their followers are not driven away,

14:43 and limiting the response to admonishing them and accepting their excuses,

14:47 and accepting their oaths,

14:49 even if the circumstantial evidence points to the contrary,

14:53 because of the reconciliation and harmony this fosters.

14:58 The permissibility of reporting what was said about someone to that person,

15:02 and it is not considered backbiting,

15:04 unless the intent behind it is absolute mischief-making.

15:09 He did not leave him to himself,

15:11 but rather strengthened him and vindicated him,

15:13 and gave him a platform.

15:16 Just as Allah revealed these verses regarding the hypocrites,

15:20 in vindication of Zayd Ibn Arqam, may Allah be pleased with him,

15:23 and to expose the shame of the hypocrites.

15:27 On the authority of 'A'ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, who said:

15:32 Hind, the wife of Abu Sufyan, said to the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him:

15:37 "Abu Sufyan is a stingy man,

15:40 and he does not give me enough to suffice me and my children,

15:44 except for what I take from him without his knowledge."

15:48 He said,

15:50 "Take what suffices you and your children in a reasonable manner."

15:54 It is agreed upon.

15:56 Stinginess is miserliness combined with greed.

16:01 "In a reasonable manner"

16:03 means a middle course, without extravagance or parsimony.

16:07 Among the benefits of the hadith:

16:11 The permissibility of mentioning a person in a way they dislike,

16:14 if it is for the purpose of seeking a legal ruling or similar reasons.

16:18 The permissibility of hearing one of the two disputing parties in the absence of the other.

16:24 The permissibility of hearing the speech of a woman regarding legal rulings and fatwas.

16:29 The word of the wife is accepted regarding the receipt of maintenance.

16:34 Because the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, did not ask her for evidence.

16:39 The obligation of the husband's maintenance, and that it is determined by sufficiency.

16:44 The obligation of the husband to provide maintenance for the woman's children.

16:49 The permissibility of issuing a judgment against an absent party.

16:52 The permissibility for a woman to look after her children, provide for them, and spend on them.

16:58 The application of custom in matters where the Shari'ah has not set a specific limit.

17:05 If a man does not provide maintenance,

17:07 the woman has the right to take from her husband's wealth without his permission what suffices her and her dependents.

17:16 The permissibility of a wife leaving her husband's house for a necessity,

17:20 if he has given her permission or she knows he is pleased with it.

17:24 Riyad al-Salihin.

Riyadh Al-Salehin | Episode (162) | Chapter on what is permissible through backbiting

Transcript